Today, I have seen one TV series, which has turned out to come up with a very sad ending, which made me think about life. Strangely enough; the people in my surroundings have been fantastic with their support, expressing empathy towards us having a baby, but I still have depressions, which is absolutely shocking. I mean, where do these depressions come from, what is wrong?
Coming back to the original thought – the series I was watching was How I met your mother. Imagine the main character spent like 9 years looking for the right person to spend life with and when, in the last episode, it was finally told he has found “the one”, like 20 minutes later it was also mentioned she got ill and died a some years later. Now what the actual fuck? I know, it is just reflecting the real life, but isn’t there enough real disasters, breakups and deaths?
Maybe it is some kind of insecurity creeping into my mind – as shown on the TV, you never know what might happen in the next hour, week, not even talking about years. And there I was sitting on a couch today, with my hand on my wife’s belly (we can already feel the movement of our daughter) and realizing what sort of world the baby has to come into. Many people have turned into duds, just looking for their own profit – they will do literally anything for their own good. A couple of eluted or maybe drunk brains are stomping each other’s mud pies. And there’s more happening, but should I name it, I would probably spend a couple of days doing that.
No, I am not being paranoid, I know there still are good people in this world, even if they are getting hard to find. And if the search for good people and friends was difficult for me, it will probably be even more difficult for our daughter.
Maybe this is something that is frightening me along with the insecurity of tomorrow… as a parent, I will need to become more responsible, watch my behavior much more, since the baby / kid is going to copy me… and the most difficult part in this world is rising the kid to a honest person. May we both be good enough to do this. And may it never happen what happened in that stupid series that has pretty much ruined my day.